CREATED TO CREATE

It's the quiet ones who no one knows about.
They are the ones who simply live out their lives according to the choices they make.
They tuck their joys and aspirations into their hearts and keep moving forward.
If there is a roadblock, they find a way to work around it.
They find ways to keep moving through mud or around brick walls in spite of circumstances pressing in on them.
They are the ones who plan and create creatively.

I am one of those women.
I have always made plans that reach beyond my current circumstances.
I just move forward.
I need no one to tell me if I am oppressed or do not have rights.
No matter what 'circumstances' surround me, I can creatively choose to rise above roadblocks.

We are beautifully and wonderfully made.
God begins with our DNA, each as different as
each snow flake or grain of sand.
My DNA is all mine, to do with as I ought.

God created me in His image.
God does not make 'junque'.
God created ME . . .
. . .  with all my faults,
. . . all my capabilities . . .  or lack of them.

God created me to grow and thrive and be who I am suppose to be . . .
. . .  according to His divine plan
. . .  able to choose according to my own personal will.

Although God might desire that I remain intimately connected with Him in all I say and do and plan, I may be selfish enough to choose another path.
God is patient.
God will wait.
God's creative work cannot be defined in our limited time and space.

We humans are finite.
We have a beginning and an end.
Each day has a beginning and an end.

It's time to LIVE!

Without notice, the seconds turn to minutes and minutes evaporate into hours.
Before I know it, the day is over.
My plans for the day may not have materialized the way I'd imagined but I learn to be content with the moments that ticked by too fast.


I make choices that I think might suit me well for the moment.
Sometimes I talk to God about them.
God is patient.
God waits for me to talk to Him and ask a blessing or ask for direction.
All of us, men and women, were created to bond with God, know God's best for us, and make the best choices so that we can create creatively . . . as God created each of us.

Women were given the gift of growing God's new creation within us.
Two seeds, joined together, immediately create a new life.
Our main purpose, as God's creation, is to keep creating.
Why would I voluntarily want to extinguish this life-creating process within me?
God created me, a woman, to carry the honor of carrying life!

Robert Baral, RN, took a picture of this 20 week old baby at
 the time of a surgical procedure to save the life of this child.
Normal gestation period is 38-42 weeks.

Oh how I grieve when I hear loud voices telling the world that all women feel exploited because they do not have access to enough resources to extinguish life.

I want to shout back but I am not a shouter.
Perhaps it's the quiet ones like me who know my body does not belong to me entirely.
My body belongs to my Creator.
My Creator invites me to use my body fully, as He designed, according to the wisdom given me.

If my body was made to create life, as God created me, then it is up to me to choose to be responsible in the way I give forth that life.
If I am able to create a human being, no matter what the circumstances, this should be a joyous moment.
About 1% of the women who have created life may not have been in control of their own choice.
1% may have a good reason to extinguish a life.
That's 1% of the 55 million lives that have been extinguished since it became legal to do so.
And there are some brave women who were raped . . .  who chose to create life and give that life to another who, in turn, was given the opportunity to raise God's precious creation.

This short video gives one a better understanding of God's Creation.
God created me, a woman, to recreate.
However, God created a caveat.
I must bond with a male.

This 'bonding' relationship is the same 'bonding' relationship I should develop with God.
I talk to God daily as I talk to my husband.
I rejoice with God daily as  I rejoice with my husband.

Because of my bond with God, I chose to marry a man who loves the Lord, thy God, as much as I do.
Because we both continue to bond with God, we honor each other as beautiful creations made in the image of God.
We have very different perspectives on the way we overcome daily challenges.
Our different perspectives only make us stronger as a couple.
No matter how we differ, we are still in one accord with God's design for us.

We both can create life.
I, a woman, can carry that life.
I know I was created to create and carry the seed of life from conception to birth.
I was created to grow a human being inside me.
Being part of God's ongoing creation and having the opportunity to carry that creation is a very healthy choice.
In fact, I was told by doctors that a woman's body is healthier in the long term if she has carried and birthed new life.
I grieve that my body is unable to carry new life to full term.
There is something in my body that has prevented this.
I could go back decades and try to figure it out.
I could ...
But God created me to be who I am, just as I am.
I have no need to blame God, myself or others.
I have all that I need or could ever want because I have assurance that God is with me always, leading me into the next opportunity to LIVE creatively.

Thirty-five years ago I gave myself, totally and unequivocally, to God through His Son, Jesus Christ.
I continue to claim Jeremiah 1:5 as God's declaration to all generations.
"Before I formed you in the womb I knew you and before you were born I consecrated you;  I have appointed you a prophet to the nations."

I may be quiet but I know that my choices are my own.
I am not a victim.
I am not oppressed.
I am beautifully and wonderfully created by my Creator to create.
I have a voice. . . as one 'called' to tell others . . . like that of a prophet.
If I am unable to create another life, I am able to influence others, creatively, to choose God's best for their lives.
God continues to use my creativity to creatively share his promises so that others may make the right choices.
I can, like a prophet, help others be the creation God created us to be.
I can creatively help others to live life as we should . . . loving others, laughing through challenges and living each moment of life, one day at a time.

God knew us before we were born.
That means, before we were born, we bonded with our creator with the creativity he created in our DNA.

WINDOWS

I washed windows the other day.
I knew the time would come when I could no longer linger outside.
All too soon it will be time to drink in the outside behind closed windows.
I figured it is better to wash them now, before it is too cold and wet and ugly to scrub the outsides.
I love how the newspaper squeaks across the glass when it has absorbed my simple solution of vinegar and water.

A dark wet day has enough light to bring into
the front of the house if the storm door is clean.

Bugs and dust and dirt spots are gone.
Streaks and blotches disappear.
The storm door takes a bit more work.
There are as many smudges on the inside as the outside.
But OH HOW IT GLISTENS!

The wonderful thing about summer is that I don't care about windows or seeing out between the blotches.
I'm outside!
Who cares if one can see nature clearly?
I'm outside!
I savor the summer months and try to linger on my porch as long as I can until my hands become numb-cold and my legs, covered by a blanket, begin to shiver a bit.

So, I spend more time inside than outside as the days grow shorter . . .  and darker.
All too soon I will need to see the outside through tempered glass.

I even move my little writing desk inside, near the most light I can find.
I move the dining table back a few feet and rearrange a new space that I carve out each winter.

If you look carefully, you can see my little computer by
the window.  From a distance you can't even see my desk.

With windows on two sides I see greens turn gold, blooms fade into stalks of tan and brown.
Red berries pop up from behind my determined red roses, still blooming strongly after the frost.

My own reflection invites me to move to one side to see the hosta thriving under the protection of our beautiful pine tree.
Candles are another interference but such a delight when they automatically turn on in the late afternoon.
Today the drizzle quietly trickles into newly turned dirt left from transplanting day lilies.

I give thanks that I have windows to keep out the cold.
I am thankful that I have such a grand view of my garden and natural beauty of the wetland area below us and acres of farms with no end in sight behind deciduous trees on the far side.

They are losing their leaves so I will soon see the old stone barn and the farmhouse with the wraparound porch.

I pull the curtain back from another window and drink in the changing garden on the side of the house.  Variegated leaves for now will soon fall and reveal bright red twigs-like branches.  When the snow falls, they will add new beauty to a white landscape.

Windows offer a view to another world in another season of life.
Windows invite me to linger longer and wonder about a new phase of my own life.
God has a window into my heart and knows exactly where I am in my walk.
Do I dare take a look inside?
The view is so murky from this side.
I need to take more time to clean the window into my heart.  There are too many blotches and streaks.

A lyric from scripture set to song comes to mind.
"Create in me a clean heart, oh God, and renew a right spirit within me ..."
Perhaps the words could change a bit to: "Clean the window to my heart, oh God, so I can see the rightness of the Spirit you planted in me."

I wander and I wonder as I sit at my window, rain beginning to drench the warm earth . . . and leaving spots on my newly polished glass.

Like the heart, this convex glass
reveals a distorted view and reflected
light from a window that seems distant.

I guess nothing is perfect . . .
 imperfect view . . .
imperfect heart for God . . .
 always an ugly blotch here and there . . .
always a need to clean and polish and take away the streaks that smudge my life.

I am thankful that I have the desire to see, or begin to see, what God presents to me, whether it is on the other side of these pieces of thermal glass or whether it is deep inside my heart.
God's view is perfect but mine is distorted and the light of Christ within me seems distant, like the reflection from this convex mirror.
Words come to mind: murky, smudged, flawed.
Yet, God sees perfection.
Since I am beautifully and wonderfully made in God's image, I should see myself as perfectly clean without splotches.
I know I don't need water and vinegar solution or scrubbing with newspaper.
All I need to do is look out my beautifully clean windows and look at God's creativity. . . and remember how God sees me.

Windows . . .

a gift to help me through the 'inside' months.

I will keep my table and chairs outside until
the first hint of snow.  Then I will know I
cannot linger on my favorite porch for awhile.

I have this little wooden window that I use all year.  I place a pretty card behind it
that reflects the current season and voila . . . I have a window to another world.

TIME

Time
Where does it go?
I think I have written a day or two ago and it's more than a week.
Time . . . it moves way too fast.
I cannot catch it.
I cannot put it in a jar and place a lid on it for future use.

Time is illusive.
I want to grab it and hold onto it and dole it out in tiny increments but the clock keeps ticking . . . forward.
I can look back and grab a memory of the past.
I can grab a moment and hold it tight, trying not to let it go.
But memories and moments become the past in less time than it takes to say the words.
Time moves forward whether I am ready to move with it or not.
I can let it go . . . let the milliseconds tick by . . . watch the world spin through space . . . which takes time.
I can linger quietly and watch time fly.
Sometimes that is soothing to the soul.
Sometimes it is frightening.
Time marches on . . .
As I take one well chosen step at a time.

I can miss-step, hold a step, skip a step, step up to the plate, step forward, step back . . . but . . . no matter how I step . . . time still marches on.

The best I can do is take time . . .
savor time . . .
stretch time . . .
linger in time . . .
according to my own little time-clock in my heart.
It may put me way behind the times . . .
or make me lag in time . . .
or run me out of time . . .
but then, it's my time to take . . .  to choose.
It's my time to use or abuse . . . or loose.

So what?
Time is what we make of it.
If I lose time,
make time,
use up time
or refuse to step in time . . .
is it my time to do with as I choose?
Sometimes.
It depends if someone else hires me to use time the way they choose.
I must ask myself if I have 'redeemed' the time properly.

More often than not,
I have plenty of time to share with others,
give to others,
give to myself and use time wisely.
But, that means I must make myself aware of time
 and bide my time
 and use my time with good intention.
That means that some time is not my own.
Whose time is it anyway?
Who made time?

God, our Creator, made time for us  . . .
to enjoy,
 use,
fill,
empty out,
give,
receive,
share,
covet . . . as we choose.
It's our choice.
Each day I make the choice.
How much time do I take to linger a littler longer in my quiet space talking . . .
and sometimes listening . . . to God?
Is it a good time or a waste of time or a fulfilling time?
Almost always it is a very pleasant time,
a fulfilling time,
an enriching, in-reach time.

As it says in Ecclesiastes:
 (2:1-8)There is a time to give birth and a time to die; a time to plant and a time to uproot what is planted.
A time to kill and a time to heal;
 A time to tear down and a time to build up.
A time to weep and a time to laugh;
A time to mourn and a time to dance.
A time to throw stones and a time to gather stones;
 A time to embrace and a time to shun embracing.
A time to search and a time to give up as lost;
 A time to keep and a time to throw away.
A time to tear apart and a time to sew together;
A time to be silent and a time to speak.
A time to love and a time to hate;
A time for war and a time for peace.

(10) I have seen the task which God has given the generations with which to occupy themselves.
 He [God] has made everything appropriate in its time.
 He has also set eternity in their heart, yet so that mankind will not find out the work which God has done from the beginning even to the end.
I know there is nothing better for them than to rejoice and to do good in one's lifetime; moreover, that all who eat and drink see good in all their labor.
It is the gift of God.
(20)All go to the same place.
 All came from the dust and all return to the dust.

One cannot find a better explanation for time.
Now to use it well.